"I can't hear you." "WHAT?"

I love you Pop. Lord knows I do but you are driving me crazy and I have taken more Xanax in the past two months than I have in my life. I can't tell you what all drives me crazy because I don't want to hurt you so here goes.

1. I am not a morning person really. I am definitely not a morning person until I pee and smoke a cigarette. Walking into my room to "see if I am awake" and then wanting to take to me about the state of the economy or some such bull shit will never work.

2. "I can't hear you." Jesus fucking Christ you can to hear me. You can hear Glenn Beck on television fine. If I whispered that I won the lottery you would hear it. You don't WANT to hear me. As proved by:

Me (four months ago) - "Pop I think that something is wrong with your ears because you aren't hearing very well all of a sudden."

Pop - "Oh don't worry Dorothy. They (I do not know who they are) send me a postcard every month and they clean out my ears really well - even better than Jose (his doctor)does. They get lots of shit out of my ears. I just have to wait for the postcard.

Me (two months ago) - "Pop 'they' never sent you a postcard. Something is really wrong with your hearing. Why don't you tell me who "they" are so that I can call and schedule an appointment to get your ears cleaned?"

Pop - "I have told you they send me a postcard every month. Didn't YOU hear THAT?

This week was the fourth of July. His other daughter and his grandson drove through Texas and we had dinner and breakfast with them. When he got bored or whatever he would just say "I can't hear you. Dorothy is supposed to make me an appointment but she won't."

He won again. Also, the day I say "I can't hear you" please just shoot me now.